1 year, 8 months, 26 days old

This has been the week of Arwen hearing a thing then saying a thing. Yes, this happens all the time with small children just learning to speak, but wow, she’s been going for it recently. Her best one this week was when we were getting her ready for bed and she grabbed my chest to steady herself when she started falling (that wasn’t the favourite bit. Kids hurt.) I told Daddy exactly where she’d grabbed me, which led to Arwen charging around the landing shouting “NIPPLE!!!” while throwing an arm in the air much in the manner of Adam, Prince of Eternia holding aloft his magic sword.  Albeit without the sword and a disappointing lack of armour on the cat. Daddy also decided to call me a “fanny” in the car today, so that’s a new word she likes shouting at me.

At only twenty and a bit months, Arwen has learnt a brilliant trick: blaming other people for farts. She’ll be happily sitting in her high chair when a small parp occurs. As is her natural reaction, she’ll immediately say “Ooh, tump!” Only now, if you ask her “Did you just tump?”, nine out of ten times she’ll say “Daddy.” Never Mummy. Only Daddy. So she can not only lie, but she’s also able to select the most believable lie. She’ll go far, that kid. Maybe into politics.

She’s also been learning what to do if adults are having their own conversation about boring grown up stuff (bills, MOTs, despair at the new season of Game of Thrones not being out until July, that kind of thing.) What you do if adults aren’t talking to you is shout “GUYS!” at the top of your voice. Works like a charm. Especially if you do it when you’re balanced precariously on the edge of the bed, looking like you’re about to throw yourself off it. Gets them every time.

Boring language paragraph that only interests me but is thankfully very short this week: last night Arwen seemed to show an understanding of past tense and how to make it work, very clearly adding an “ed” to the end of a verb. I was amazed. And also really proud, because her first past tense was reserved for the verb “pooed”. Fantastic.

This has been quite a thoughtful week for Arwen too. On Wednesday we were walking back from the park and went past some allotments. I pointed out the people working away next to sticks with bottles on them (what the hell is that all about anyway?) digging and generally being very Good Life. Arwen pondered them for a moment then gave her considered opinion on the matter: “mucky.” She’s not wrong.

Arwen’s determination to help around the house has increased this week; she’s learnt “pillow” as we stripped the bed and “brush” as we brushed the floor. Weirdly though, she also then took the brush, shoved it under my nose and quite aggressively told me to “Niff!”  Mind you, she doesn’t always want to be helpful. On Friday, after having her nappy changed on the bed at Nana’s, she wanted to get down and I told her she couldn’t until she’d put her shoes on. She looked at me with resignation, then said almost under her breath “Ah, nuts.”

Her word of the week this week though is most definitely “nice”. It’s a brilliant word that can be said when running your soft hairbrush over your feet, when eating some mango or when you’ve just learnt to open doors for yourself, thus turning Mummy and Daddy’s lives upside down in an instant.


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