1 year, 11 months, 18 days old
As hilarious as Arwen always is, this week there hasn’t been much that has stood out in terms of what she’s said, so I was a little concerned that I mightn’t have much to write about. But then I had an idea: why not write about the funny things she always says? The way she gets certain words confused or the bizarre ways she pronounces some words that one day she’ll grow out of and we’ll really miss? So I thought about some of the loveliest and funniest things she says and so, to quote the legend that is Julie Andrews, these are a few of my favourite things.
I’ve decided to split this into three sections: words that she gets right but pronounces really bizarrely, words that she uses in entirely the wrong context and words she’s misheard and has her own unique interpretation of. To the bizarre ones then. Arwen likes to choose which yogurt she has and usually goes for peach first, because there’s clearly something wrong with her. I mean peach? Really? Anyway, sometimes she sees sense and decides she wants strawberry. Or “toooorberry”. This is always accompanied by raising her chin as high as she can, as though she’s imploring the gods for the yogurt she so desperately needs. She’s also used to going to cafes with Mummy and Daddy (well, when you’re getting into a National Trust place for free with your cards, it’d be rude not to buy a drink) and so is used to our order. Mummy has “hot tocklit” and Daddy has “coffee”. But if you press her, she’ll clarify that the coffee Daddy actually wants is “laaaahhhhtay”. Where on earth that pronunciation has come from we’ve no idea, but it’s amused the staff in many a cafe in the north west.
As for the right word in the wrong context, Arwen has toys in the back of the car to play with and sometimes when she’s sitting there, she asks you to pass her something she can’t reach. Including her “mangoes”. It took me a few weeks to realise that mangoes are a set of magnets given to her by her great aunt. Obviously. And she loves her book with cardboard tools that you can take out and play with. She knows the words “spanner”, “drill”, “plunger” and many more. Except hammer. That’s a “banger”.
And then we have the words she’s sort of got the pronunciation of, but has her own inimitable take on. These include “dagin” for dragon, though to be fair that one is a little bit Daenerys Targaryen. Seriously, it took the mother of dragons far too long to realise they’re dragOns, not dragIns. Anyway. Arwen is a child who doesn’t have hiccups but “heycups” and isn’t fascinated by bumblebees like other kids, but “bumpybees”. She’s great at most animal noises, despite often making no sound at all when attempting a pig’s grunt, but she’s still under the impression that a cockerel says “cockalooloo”. That’s probably because we’ve never, ever corrected her though. But my favourite by far of all the words she has no idea she’s getting wrong comes when she reads her beloved Winnie the Witch books. Whenever Winnie gets ready to do a spell, Arwen waves her imaginary wand five times (she’s getting a replica wand made by Daddy for her birthday, but don’t ruin the surprise) grins her head off and shouts “ABREEABBA!!!” I can’t tell you how many times we’ve read the same three Winnie the Witch stories over and over just to get her to shout that as it gets me every time. We’ve got her a set of Winnie books for her birthday, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to correct her when we read them.
Oh, and I’ve just remembered that I started by saying she hadn’t said much of interest this week. On Friday I told her I loved her and asked whether she loved me too. Her entirely predictable response? “No, love Daddy.” Cheers, kid.