It a bit wiggly

2 years, 8 months, 19 days old

It’s been a long time since I last wrote a blog. I’m not really sure why, but it just has. Because of that, there’s quite a lot to cover, including helpful advice, lots of poo talk, various words for things hurting and some teenage responses.

The advice has in some cases come from me, in other cases come from Arwen. For example, when she had a cold a couple of weeks ago, I advised her to put her hand over her mouth when she coughed. She looked at me angrily and told me “That don’t work!” I’m not sure what she expected it to do, but it was terrible advice, nonetheless. Better advice came from Arwen herself warning Nana “Careful on the stairs Nana. They steep. They a bit dangerous.” It’s important to be made aware of these issues in your own home. Arwen’s always keen to help, and pleased with herself for doing so, or at least she appeared to be when I was tidying up recently and she came over and said “I’ll help.” She then responded to herself with “That most kind.” She’s also keen on recognising when other people have been helpful. She pointed out that one of the taps had a red bit on it yesterday, so I told her that red taps are hot, blue ones are cold, to which she nodded and replied “Ooh, sensible!” But the best piece of advice she’s come up with recently was in regards to the hilarious game we now have of making someone stand near the front of the car when we’re in it, then beeping the horn to make them jump. When we were waiting for Nana to come out of her house a couple of weeks ago and getting ready to make her jump, Daddy tried to point out just how much he’d make Nana jump by saying “When she comes out, I’ll make her poo herself.” To which Arwen sensibly replied “No, just beep the horn.”

And speaking of poo, it’s still one of Arwen’s favourite topics. She likes to coach it along when sitting on the toilet by saying “Come on poo!” and comment on how it’s going with phrases like “That’s a big poo! And a teeny tiny one at the end.” But it’s not just poo that’s fascinating, wee is also up there too. when I said I needed a wee the other day, Arwen helpfully explained to me how it all works. “Daddy pulls his willy out and goes for a wee. I pull my knickers down and go for a wee.” Both these sentences had accompanying actions. I’ll leave them to your imagination.

Being two and a half, one of Arwen’s main hobbies is falling over. Seriously, she’s upright one second, then flat on her face the next, with nothing in between. So her knees have recently been “hurty” and “owwy”. Both quite sensible. The word that we’re not quite sure of was when we asked whether her tummy was ok as she seemed to be rubbing it. We got the baffling reply “It looks funny. Yeah. It a bit wiggly.” Nope, me neither.

There have been other topics of conversation too, for example how much she loves her parents. Giving us a big group hug last night, she announced “I love you people.” Being her mother’s daughter, she also likes to discuss food. Daddy is an excellent baker, and Arwen likes to help him out. When I got the mixer down last week, her immediate response was to shout “Fifty grams of sugar!” I was making pizza dough at the time, so I’m not sure she’d got her measurements quite right. The one thing she has got spot on though, is her attitude. She’s got a wonderful new habit of looking down at the floor with disdain when being told to do something awful like brush her teeth, and muttering “Fine!” She may only be two, but she’s got the makings of a proper teenager.

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